notes from my recent "blog" #5

When Hearts Colide (18th of June, 2009)


life has up and downs
sure

but when hearts collide
when hearts collide

you want to think
but thinking hurts

you want to be brave
but you're afraid

you want to run away
but you're chased

you want to deal with it
but you're ain't sure with what you're dealing with

you want to ask for help
but you never had enough

you want to catch
but you don't know where to start

you want to smile
but it never lasts too long

you want to fly
but you begin to fall

you want to be numb
but you feel too much

you want to blame
but there's no one to be blamed

you want to search for reasons
but you don't even know what's happening

there's no escape
when hearts collide

not even turning back
when hearts collide

notes from my recent "blog" #4

Online Kokology

LOVE this test.90% true :)
try one for yourself http://www.quizbox.com/personality/test82.aspx

this is my quiz result

Your view on yourself:

Other people find you very interesting, but you are really hiding your true self. Your friends love you because you are a good listener. They'll probably still love you if you learn to be yourself with them.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:

Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.

Your views on education

Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:

You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:

Success in your career is not the most important thing in life. You are content with what you have and think that being with someone you love is more than spending all of your precious time just working. >


What are you most afraid of:

You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.

Who is your true self:

You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

notes from my recent "blog" #3

Can You Hear The Heartbeat (29 October 2009)

It feels

like a sun
shining upon the flawless sky
shimmering
but alone

like a moon
looking down into the center of the world
flaring
but curious

like a ship
making it's way to the shore
trembling
but tough

Maybe I'm just a dust
and you're my wind
I always go your way
there's no good for struggling

Well when the wind is gone
I don't know where to go
when to leave
or how to believe

are you still here?

notes from my recent "blog" #2

Curhatan Orang Gila (October 30th, 2009)

kenapa sih? nggak tau kenapa
cuma pengen teriak
nggak ada inspirasi
stuck
aku ini siapa?
mau jadi apa?
ingin berbuat apa?
nggak tau
rasanya kayak ngambang
gak tau jalan tapi nggak punya peta
tolong

notes from my recent "blog" #1

Goodluck My Dear

Hari ini (5 November 2009) gw terharu gara-gara dosen logpenil gw. Jadi ceritanya gw dapet mata kuliah logika dan penulisan ilmiah. Nah di matkul ini kita disuruh bikin 3-5 jurnal tiap bulannya. Jurnalnya itu bisa berisi tulisan argumentatif, induktif-deduktif, atau bahkan curhatan. Ceritanya bulan lalu tugas jurnal udah mendekati deadline sedangkan gw lagi stuck banget gak ada ide. Karena bener-bener bingung akhirnya gw curhat deh tuh tentang love life gw yang buruk hehe.

Ternyata tugas jurnal ini bakal dikasih feedback sama dosen gw yaitu Mbak Evi sama Mbak Dian Wisnu, tapi sekali feedback bareng-bareng 5 orang. Pas dikasih tau kayak gitu gw udah panik. Mati deh, pikir gw, gw udah curhat panjang lebar gitu nanti difeedback trs didenger sama anak-anak kan malu banget.

Eh gataunya pas kuliah tadi pagi beberapa orang dipanggil dan di feedbacknya sendiri-sendiri sama Mbak Dian. Alhamdulillah gw termasuk satu diantara sekian orang. Di tulisan pertama gw, gw ngomongin tentang rumah dan cinta kasih di dalamnya. Lumayan lah feedbacknya bagus cuma kurang ini itu sedikit. Masuk ke tulisan kedua gw yang tentang curhat itu muka gw udah merah banget. Gw bilang gw malu bangett. Dosen gw dengan senyumnya bilang nggak apa-apa. Mbak Dian nyuruh gw baca buku tentang teori cinta gitu. Terus Mbak Dian bilang kurang lebih kayak gini "kamu jangan pernah nge-lable diri kamu pakar patah hati (well that's what I wrote in my journal hehe). Semua orang pasti akan bertemu dengan the right one, kamu juga pasti akan ketemu sama orang yang tepat untuk kamu.Jadi kamu jangan nyerah dulu." Mbak Dian ngomong semua itu sambil senyum dan dengan gesture yang sangat menenangkan. Mbak Dian bahkan nyeritain tentang pengalamannya ke gw.

Ga nyangka banget gw jurnal gw bakal ditanggepin kayak gitu. Gw kira Mbak Dian cuma bakal ngebenerin kalimat-kalimat mana aja yang sumbang, kesimpulan, dan temen2nya lah. Ternyata bukannya nyorat-nyoret jurnal gw, Mbak Dian malah ngasih note buat gw dibawah tulisan gw. Terharu bangett gw hehehe. Gak salah deh masuk psikologi Thanks Mbak Dian, for reminding me :)

you and me

dari awal emang gw udah nyadar kok
beneran deh gw nyadar
dari awal juga gw udah bilang ke lo
gw udah bilang nggak usah dipaksain
ga usah dipaksain cuma karena janji tolol lo yg ga bisa dipertanggungjawabin itu
gw ngerti kalo emang udah ngga ada apa-apa diantara kita
mungkin orang-orang bilang gw lemot, tapi maaf, gw NGGAK BEGO

tiap gw nanya ke lo
lo selalu punya sejuta alasan

lo tau kenapa baru sekarang gw minta udahan sama lo?
karena gw juga mikirin lo
gimana kalo ternyata itu cuma perasaan gw
gimana kalo emang lo sayang sama gw
lo tau kenapa baru sekarang?
karena selama ini gw gamau nyakitin lo
tapi ternyata lo yang nyakitin gw. dari awal.
gw nggak peduli kalo lo nggak menuhin janji lo
gw nggak pernah maksa lo
gw cuma butuh kepastian

dulu gw kira lo orang yang berperasaan
ternyata gw salah

tolong nggak usah kegeeran
udah cukup buat gw

gw cuma berharap nggak ada qya qya yang lainnya
say you love somebody if you really mean it
love is not a game
good for you, I DON'T LOVE YOU ANYMORE

Borrowing Miley's 7 Thing

I probably shouldn't say this
But at times I get so scared
When I think about the previous
Relationship we shared

It was awesome but we lost it
It's not possible for me not to care
And now we're standing in the rain
But nothing's ever gonna change
Until you hear, my dear

The 7 things I hate about you!
The 7 things I hate about you, oh you
Your lies
your world

your carelessness
You love me you like her
You make me laugh, you make me cry
I don't know which side to buy

Your excuses, they're cheesy
When you talk it out, don't you know it hurts?
I wanna be with the one I know
And the 7th thing I hate the most that you do
You make me love you

It's awkward and silent
As I wait for you to say
What I need to hear now
Your sincere apology

When you mean it, I'll believe it
If you text it, I'll delete it
Let's be clear
Oh, I'm not coming back
You're taking 7 steps here

And compared to all the great things
That would take too long to write
I probably should mention the 7 that I like

The 7 things I like about you
Your words

your tricks

your old sides
your soothing words when I felt down
You make me laugh, you make me cry
But I guess that's both I'll have to buy

Your hands in mine
When we're intertwined, everything's alright
I wanna be with the one I know
And the 7th thing I like most that you do
You make me love you, you do

this is the original song. sorry to change the lyrics a bit..